Never Give Up - 24th Mar 2008

YESTERDAY supposed to be the last day for me to know the results of my job interviewed. I tried to contacts the company but nobody pick up my phone calls. I tried to make a few phone calls but still nobody answered. I start to feel miserable so i sent an email to the contacts person (the HR lady in-charge of my interviewed) but unfortunately there was no reply until today. I send SMS to one of the candidates that attend the interviewed with me. I wait for her reply.

Actually, i just came back from my field trip which we are doing small mammals trapping and camera traps inspections. So, when i get back home i feel very tired and my head is till thinking, will i be hired by that company or not?

As usual i will watch television after get myself clean and after a while i went to my working room. Planning to do my work but i can't thinking properly right now. I am worry too much about the results of my inteview. I put a very high hope on getting this job because i already get enough from the company that i work for now. There were no more excitement and no more motivation for me working here. The main things when i feel unmotivated to work, my performance in my work will drop like a water flow from the highest waterfall.
Suddenly, i received SMS from the girl that attended the interviewed with me. She got the job and already report duty three days ago. Put yourself in the situation, and i am sure the frustration will be very bad. Its means that there will be no hope for me. I feel like the top of Mount Kinabalu drop on my head and damage me badly.

As usual when i received sudden news like this my reaction is very crazy. What comes out from my mind will uncontrolled and i can say that i am very emotional person. I cried last night and i promised myself that it will be my last cried of my failure in getting a job. If i failed again next time, i will accept it and remind myself, that is not what God wants me to do because He have another plan for me.

However, i still feel very bad and it is just like "sudah jatuh ditimpa tangga". Why? This is because i already failed to finish my study within two years study period. If i finish within two years, i will be graduated August 2008. I SMS my good friend and told him that i failed to get the job. My best friend tried to console me but i know he already done his best to gives his support and i thank him for always encourage and support me through bad times in my life.

In time like this, surely i will remember one person that can give me strength (as he always does before) but i am not sure he will or not this time. He is my ex-bf but now we are friends. I send him SMS asking for his inspired words. He did reply me and what he says makes me feel better and what he say is so true. Thank you so much for your word of encouragement.

" u r much stronger than just giving up like that...leave ur woes to God and he will show u the way..but do not give up..sometimes in life we always find roadblocks but somewhere or rather we will always find our way back be patient and persistent..that's the Rose i know.." i? I think so..and i feel much better after that.

I promised myself that i will never give up and i will finish my study and will keep on doing my work as what i have done before. I will keep continue doing great works as my FATHER want me to do. Thank God that HE always sent wonderful people to help me to go through the bad times in my life. Thank you LORD.


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