At last after so many not-so-good things happen to me, one by one ... I feel HAPPY to be here in Ube City, Japan. Three days upon arrival we were at Chugoku JICA Center. Got two classes to get the familiarization with Japan management structure and system, continued by cultural and traditions of Japanese people. We did not have enough time for more exposure on the Japanese custom and so on.
We officially start our training today at Ube City in Yamaguchi Prefecture. Starting with official meeting with Ube City Mayor. We had a long journey by bus from HigashiHiroshima to Ube City. It takes about 3 and half hours drive. But the road condition here is very good and no traffic, smooth journey.
Tomorrow will be another day and now i need some rest... Till then..
Enough rough moments i get these past two weeks. People makes my life so miserable. Makes me think i am useless and stupid to be fooled around like this. I am DONE with the hell your games is. Whatever you think you can do to me, i just let it be. I am not a fighter for something stupid like what you did to me. I will just stick to my own decision. Why? Because THIS IS MY LIFE.... I Live MY LIFE not someone else LIFE okay. So, i can make my own decision, WISE or not let it be me myself determine and face any consequences later on.
Are you HAPPY when you turn my life so complicated and miserable like now? I BET you are UNHAPPY inside.. Why? Because i know you are a KIND and GENEROUS person but because of this condition you dare to make my life upside down. At the end, you will reflects and think back of what you did to me, and that time i HOPE you will realize that you whack someone else life and that is not so good things to do.
Banyak benda dua minggu ni nda pandai selesai dan sangat bikin pusing kepala dan akhirnya menjurus kepada STRESS. Sya mengenalpasti tahap kestressan sya dan telah menyebabkan beberapa efek kepada diri sya. Antaranya ialah:
Tiba-tiba hidung gatal terus bersin terus jadi budak hingusan... nda pandai bagus ni... berhingus saja...Belakang leher ataupun dikenali sebagai tengkuk jadi stiff dan rasa sengal2 ja ni... Mata tiba2 menjadi merah dan pedih... macam kena infeksi saja ni.. Bertaik ja ni mata sudah..Haid tiba2 datang sedangkan dua minggu yang lalu baru ja sya period... haiyah!!Senang sekali mengalirkan air mata.. nda patut2 mau menagis pun tiba2 ja air mata mengalir... doiiii!!Cukupla tu lima ja... jgn lagi kasi tambah... Sya nda mau jadi gila... Kesihatan sya betul2 terganggu bila emosi sya nda stabil disebabkan masalah yang nda pandai selesai ni.. Bagus kasi SELESAI itu orang yang bikin hidup sya porak peranda ni!!!! .... Alahai, Jesus, please forgive me... huhuhuhu..
I can not tolerate with people who: Hypocrite (double faces) ---- see Wikipedia for the full definition.Talk only no Action ---- Haiks.... bikin panas ni orang begini ni.Complaining ---- Esp talk bad about other people (i oso do sometime but if everyday.... dooohhh... please, no body is perfect.. ko perfect sangat kah?).Take things for granted ---- Sometimes things that looks so simple and easy become so complicated when you just overlook that thing okay...Perfectionist ---- Well, some people love being so mess up but work still can be done... Adopt with other people work style.. (Nda semua orang hebat macam kau bah!).. See Wikipedia for the difinition.... Double standard ---- Please just be FAIR okay.... See Wikipedia for the meaning of this..Gossiping in the office from morning till lunch hour and then continue till end of office hours... ---- Please, i have things to do.. I need to complete my work!!Bla bla bla.....Okay, enuff said. Still got some more but i think if i list out all …
Last week, on Friday... I feel very down. Something not so good things happen in the office etc etc... Feel very weak, emotionally break down (i may say)... Never feel this BAD for so long.. This one makes me feel like i am a fool, stupid, alone, angry (all sort of negative feelings). Get out from the office, enter my car and burst into tears in my car... Call my bestfriend, and talk to her for a while.... Feel better but just a lil bit. Drive back home and when i reach home, i don't know what to do.. I am lost... Take my bath and thinking of going away but don't know where am i heading. Feel like to drink some beer with friends and make myself drunk and forget all of these mess. But deep inside my heart say something else. HOLD ONTO JESUS. Log in FB and write my status: feel like to vomit.... emotionally break down....
why makes my life so miserable... why can't make it simple and let it go....
i need an alcohol shot...... or a silent moment with Jesus?
Have been silence from Blogging World. So much things happen so, where to start over? Okay, since i promised to Ashley Easther at Eat.Pray.Love to play this TAG thing, so i must keep my promise. Here it is:
Rules & Regulations:
♥ each person must post 11 things about themselves in their journal .
♥ answer the question the tagger set for u in their post and create 11 new questions for the people u tagged the answer .
♥ choose 11 people to tag the post and link them the post .
♥ go to their page and tell them u have tagged her/him .
♥ no tags back .
11 Things About Rose Ragai
Love Jesus, Love My Family, Love My Friends VERY VERY MUCH.Love new adventure, travelling, exploring new things.Love jungle trekking, love being in the forest cause i love animals.. wild animals esp birds and mammals.Love wild animals but still can't get rid of my phobia of snakes.Love traditional food such as umai (Melanau food), ayam pansuh (Iban & Bidayuh food), hinava & bosou bakas (Kadazan-Dusun),…
Okay, i am too much on my not stable emotions this past two weeks. Maybe it is because too many things happen at the same time and i am physically tired too (that's why i get sick..huhuhu).
So, today i want to share a few photos i captured during EE Race 9 organized by EPD end of June this year. Last year we have the same programme too but this year is more FUN!!! Yai!! I love the fact thats all the teachers were very excited and the spirit to learn something new is inspiring me. Here we go...
Can you see all the teachers are all very hardworking? Taking notes, listens carefully to the explanation, some very eager to do practical parts and even enjoy the moments!! They did learn a lots from this four days programme. Thank God i am one of the fasilitator and i love these teachers.... (^___^) Till then! --- Inspired Liitle Rose
Sorry for being sounds so demotivated.... Sorry for being so down and depress...... Sorry for writing something is not inspiring you..... Sorry for wasting your time reading all the mess i wrote here these past two weeks..... Today.... I feel much more better and relief... I make up my mind.... I can see a clear picture ahead of me.... My heart realize what i really want.... Have to sacrifice and let go of something to get something better.... Sounds selfish? That is what i thought at first! But... Life have to move on... To move on to another phase and It's MY LIFE... GOD gave me CHOICES so i have to DECIDE and CHOOSE... Which WAY? HE WILL GUIDE ME THROUGH.... God Bless!! --- Feel Blessed Little Rose
I have decided, i have decided. Please don't make me change my mind again. I already give my 100% to this decision. Don't make me have a second thought about this. There is no turning back. Errkk... Is it? Ahhh... why is this so difficult?
I thought after made this decision i will feel at PEACE. But why is it still feel so HEAVY inside my heart? Am i making the right move? Am i make the right CHOICE?
Jesus, lead me to Your way. Lead me to do more of your Will. Lead me and guide me.
This is me right now. Don't know what to do. In the midst of something that i don't know how to decide and how to come up with the solution. I am blank, i can not think, i am confused, i can't get any good answer. I am just ...... I don't know.... -- Confused Little Rose