Disappointed Vs. Grateful

I am suppose to be HAPPY but yet feel lonely and upset inside. Why? Maybe i am expecting too much. Expecting things happen as i think it should be. But yet, i forgot that it will never happen as perfect as i wish it to be happen. Why? Because some things happen for a reason. Some things happen how God want it to happen. The lists that i wish should be happen last week:

1. Having "Sahur" on the 1st Ramadhan with my brother's family.
2. See and playing with my wonderful six nieces and nephews (3 never met yet).
3. Attending Mass on the celebration of St. Ignatius feast at St. Ignatius Church with my brother.
4. Bring my father to St. Bernard and having a chit chat with Father in charge there.
5. Did not meet my eldest sister when i am at home.
6. Walking at Carpenter's Street at Kuching Waterfront and buying some souvenirs for friends.
7. Celebrating my friend's birthday with the cake that i bought for her. 
8. Having some more foods in Kuching, still not enough of Laksa Kuching, Mi Kolok, KuehChap etc...

But still i am grateful that some did happen:

1. Meet up with my long lost friends at KL and stay at one of their house (spending my time with her).
2. Attending Mass at St. John Cathedral at KL and thank you Jesus for Your presence.
3. Walking at Jln TAR & SOGO, finding some 'tudung' and 'phasmina' for my sisters & friends.
4. Spend one night with my sister and three of her children at Sibu. Have chance to cook chicken curry for them (berbuka puasa).
5. Spend two days with my parents at home (kampong) and my niece. Even though for only two days, i am really grateful that i am going back and this makes me regret that i did not going straight back home instead of flying to KL and Kuching. 
6. Spend one night with my other sister at Sibu. Waiting for her at ICU Ward reminds me of my student's years when i always waiting for her at various wards (Orthopedic, Female Medical, Labour Room, ICU...). Waiting for her to finish her shift and we went back to her house. 
7. Meet up with my friend at Kuching and be able to see her son. 
8. Attend Sunset Mass at St. Joseph Cathedral, Kuching with one of my long lost friend (never met her since 2004). Thank you Jesus for Your presence. Be able to buy some souvenir at church souvenir shop. 

Looks like, it is equal. 8 - 8. So no regrets i am going home. Till then! God bless.

With Love,

Little Rose