TRUE CONFESSIONS

These few days i am blank. I don't know what to write. What to share here in my blog. Nothing much that can inspire me to write my own thoughts. When there is nothing come up in my mind, i am stuck and i can not produce anything here. Sabah will having a holiday started from tomorrow until 31st May. It's Harvest Festival and will be celebrated by Kadazan-Dusun of Sabah so i will be away for holiday (am I?)...hmmm... Anyway.. Happy Holiday and for my: KADUS FRIENDS ~ KOTOBIAN TADAU TAGAZOO DO KAAMATAN.....ARAMAITHIH!!! IBAN/ BIDAYUH FRIENDS ~ SELAMAT ARI GAWAI, GAYU GURU GERAI NYAMAI..OOOOOHHAAAA!!! OTHERS ~ HAPPY HAPPY HOLIDAY...... YEEEAHHH....!!! With Love, Little Rose

Never give your power away. You have six personal gifts to control your own destiny and stay great. Greatness is being responsible, and doing what is expected of you. To be in control of your own destiny you must be pro-active. Life takes place in a decision. When you take action to make something happen, stuff is going to happen. What to do about what happens, after you make something happen is where you take control. When stuff happens that you did not plan on, that is opportunity knocking. First personal gift: Knowledge - Without knowledge you will have no power to take action. Build on the knowledge already have. Learned knowledge is power. Observe, listen, read, smell, taste, touch, practice, practice, and practice. I am willing to listen, learn, and change how I think. Think big. It does not cost anything to think big. When you think big, you are taking care of yourself. When you think small you are focusing on your ego. The self always thinks big. Second personal gift: Gr...

" Celebrate every day with enthusiasm for LIFE! Recognize each second of every day is a  GIFT to make the world a better place! Appreciate the time you have to share your magnificent talents with others! Choose to make a DIFFERENCE ! Do it every day and DO IT BIG!!!" By Jimmy Hagewood --- Alabama I wish i could....... With Love, Little Rose

It has been a while i did not do any sports. Feel very lazy because of too many out station duties. Travel here and there. Today, i plan to play squash with some of my friends. I did not have racquet yet but hope to share it with my friends. I want to let my body sweats and get rid of all the toxics in my body. I realize that after i am sweating my body become more energetic. Suddenly i wants to do all my house works or even back to my gardening activities. So, i hope our plan for today will be on. See you guys at Squash Court!! With Love, Little Rose

Photo credit to Rammy-Doll Have a blessed morning with a bright sunshine shining on us...  God bless... With Love, Little Rose

I want to have a vacation. A long break from my job, my work place. I want to be away for a while. Looking for an online ticket at Air Asia, Mas Wing and Fire Fly but still i don't know where to go. Checking my leave balance and it is only 4.5 days. Ah... still too short for a week holiday. I always dream to go to a place i've never been and alone. I want to feel how to survive alone. Can i make it? Hmmm... i am not sure and i am not confident i can make it alone though. There are a few places i want to visit, I want to visit my friends John and Jodi Ferner at Ohio, USA ( i miss them since our last meet January 2007 ), i want to visit Mama Nini at New Zealand and quite a few friends there, i want to visit Mr. Rob at Samarinda, Kalimantan ( hope i get the right one, is it Samarinda? ), i want to visit my niece and nephews at Kota Kemuning, Shah Alam... I miss my friends and families la... mmmm... Beside visiting them there are a few other places tha...

Just feel i am blessed having so many best buddies where ever i go. This is all for you guys. For accepting me as who i am, very complicated sometimes and always make up my mind last minute. So, may God blessings be upon you guys and our friendship will last forever. God bless. Credit to Google Credit to Google With Love, Little Rose

When i am working as a field biologist i develop my observation skills. Most of the time when i went into the forest I will observe animals from mammals until the little damselflies. I get used to the movements of the birds on the trees or a squirrels jumping from tree branch to another. Seeing a lemur glides from top of the tree to another tree. The sound of the birds always makes me wonder of what species is that could be. The curiosity is very high. Wanted to know more and see more of any wildlife species. That is my passion, to understand and learn more about them and their habitat. NOW? I am working with communities, i develop another parts of my observation skills. To understand more of how different communities have their own way of life through their culture and traditions. The attitudes and mind set of different ethnic are obviously distinct. Through my observation, i get to know who i can trust and who is actually play around with me. Trying to manipulate me to get somethi...

Beatitudes for Teachers Blessed are you who are called to teach, for you walk in the footsteps of the Master. Blessed are you who sow peace and harmony in the staffroom, yours will be the joy of the Lord. Blessed are you who plant seeds of hope in youthful hearts, for you will inherit the dawn. Blessed are you who are sensitive to the cries of youth today, for they yearn for the coming of the Kingdom. Blessed are you when you anguish now because your students are difficult, for one day they will thank you for your loving concern. Blessed are you when efficiency is moderated by compassion and empathy, for the deeper secret of education is yours. Blessed are you when you reach out to me in your students, for you will surely find me and rejoice. Blessed are you who lead young people in the paths of justice and peace, for you will shine like stars for all eternity. HAPPY TEACHER'S DAY TO ALL TEACHERS IN THE WORLD. GOD BLESS. With Love, Little Rose

When i am young, i depend so much on my parents, siblings.... As i grow up, i tried to handle things in my life by myself. Even so, i still need advice and opinion from my sisters and brothers or even my friends. When i start working i tried my very best to be independent. To take control of my own life. To learn to make decisions for my life. To work hard and gain some income to support my own living. Trying my very best not to give trouble and burden to my parents and my siblings anymore. I hope i did so. But then when i see or met people with no initiative to work hard for their living, i feel pity for them and a little bit disappointed. With all the resources and good, strong health they can do so much work to gain something for their living. To improve the way of their current state of living but then they only waiting for government or company to support and help them with subsidy. The mind set of these people is so shallow. If there is no more government to support them,...

I am tired body and mind. Just came back from my out station duty last night. Arrive home at about 8.45pm. Thank you so much my dearest friends and families for your prayer for me for this trip. It was really interesting and challenging trip. I may say that i am not well prepared for the trip especially mentally. The people i met is so much different people. I was surprised because between the two villages that i went, there were two different mind set of the communities. I am working half day today. Hope to have a good rest after work today. So, wait for my sharing in my next posts. There were a lots to share and it was quite an expereinced. Have a great weekend guys! God bless. With Love, Little Rose

I will be away for five days. Having handicraft training with the Murut communities at rural area somewhere in Tenom. So, i will be silence from my blogging world for a while. Just pray for me that i will be safe and our programme (activities) will be successfully done. Jesus walk with me. Amen. With Love, Little Rose

I like to plan. I like it when i plan ahead before any events or programme start. But i hate it when things not happen to be as planned. Even how perfect my plan is there will be a change here and there when the times come. I really hate it. For this, i am talking about work. Last minute changes brings headache to me. Therefore, i need to mentally and physically prepare. Expect the unexpected. In life, in my personal life i have no plan. I don’t have goal in my life. WHY? I am not sure why but there is a reason that i can not shared here. I live my life following the flows. I learn to believe God has His plan for me. I am doing things according to His Will. I plan a little bit, but when things keep on changing and not happen as my plan, i learn to believe God has another plan for me. Maybe what i am doing now is not what He wanted me to do to let His Kingdom known in this world. So, i live my life being grateful of what i have right now. As long as i know that my God never leave me a...

I am talking too much these few days. With quite a few things that happen and pop up in my mind. Something happen again today. But i don't want to elaborate much about it. Just to reduce me talking too much, i am sharing these great videos from You Tube about Forgive, Forget and Letting Go. There is always a reason why i come up with all sort of things this few days. I am trying to reflects through my own experienced and what i observed and learn from others. I hope this videos will help those who are in such situation right now. The GIFT of FORGIVENESS is AMAZING because it will make us live our life PEACEFULLY and full of JOY in our HEART . When there is HATRED let there be LOVE... . With Love, Little Rose

Second reading today remind me of this song. This song is one of my favourite song.  I have a great day today. I hope you also have a blessed day.  With Jesus our Saviour. God bless. With Love, Little Rose

Mother's Day.... Have a chit chat with my friend. She told me that she miss her late mother very much especially on the Mother's Day because they always celebrate it when her mother still alive. I envy her a little bit in my heart because i never celebrate one with my mom. I told her to pray to God on this special day for her mother soul. For her to rest in peace and be with HIM . Every year when my friend wish their mum's and bought special presents for their mum, again i envy them. They really celebrate that day, Mother's Day with their mum. ME? I don't have one of those feelings on Mother's Day.   WHY? Because each and everyday of my life, in my heart... MY MUM IS ALWAYS SPECIAL IN MY HEART ... in my mind, I KEEP THINKING OF HER .... I MISS MY MUM A LOT . ( now my tears start to run down..okay2... emotional a little bit.. )... I am sure, mum feel the same for all of us, her children. Keep thinking about all of us, misses her children very much... hoping...

I am being grateful of what i am and who i am now. REALLY?? I may say YES at some point but sometimes i forgot to be grateful when i think of getting more than i have right now. Am i greedy? NOPE . It is just my human feeling that i tend to envy others for having a lots of better things in their life compare to me. But then, when i meet or see others who are less fortunate than me, i am GRATEFU L that i am who i am now. I don't want to become greedy. I want to APPRECIATE what i have. I want to thank GOD for giving a great life for me. I have enough food to eat, a house i called home to give me shelter, a job for me to move on with my daily life..... I have a wonderful parents who loves me, I have my great brothers and sisters and i know they love me too, I have sis/bro-in-laws , nieces, nephews who can stand with my quite an attitude... I have aunts, uncles, cousins, relatives who may knows me or may not but they are my kin.... I have amazing friends near and far... I am tru...

Joy. Happy. Sad. Angry. Blank. Blues.... etc... All sorts of feelings, which mode of feeling do i have right now? An hour ago, i am a little bit piss off with somebody and i burst it out. I can not control my emotion and i shout back. Hmmm... Feel not good about it though. That is why Malay proverb tend to say “Terlajak perahu boleh ditarik, telajak kata buruk padahnya..” Maybe i hurt other’s feeling today. Maybe i made them mad at me too. So now, am i regret for doing it? NOPE . I did not feel guilty about it but only a little bit uneasy in my heart. Why? I think i already get used to it until i did not feel guilty anymore. Working environment like this makes me become someone that sometime i did not even recognize myself anymore. BUT... I am still who i am. Don’t worry, i am still a HUMAN being and have compassion for others. Till then! With Love, Little Rose P.s: Did i write the correct one? Feelings or Emotions? Hmmm....

Good Morning to you too. I have an ordinary Friday morning even though i am hoping that this morning is an extra ordinary morning. But it is fine because when i wake up, i am still breathing. Thanks be to God for giving me another day in this world. As i keep myself silence in my room, i can hear the sounds of chirping birds on the trees outside my window. I can hear my neighbour kids are going to school. I can hear the sounds of my cat, Joy meowing in the living room... Hmmm... I know i am living, i know i am NOT ALON E this morning. Yep, a greetings of GOOD MORNING from my sweet housemate. All makes me knowing that this morning is extra ordinary in an ordinary ways . Have a blessed and fruitful morning to all of you. Good day everyone! With Love, Little Rose

I want to put up the title as SMILE but then i decided to change it to this. Why? Hmmm... Do you ever face a situation where you can not smile or laugh because of stress due to problem at works or personal problems? I think this is happen most of the time to me. But sometime i use my smile and laugh to cover up my problems. Fake Smile? YES . I used to do it but i am not a good pretender because at the end of it, i will CRY. Laughter. I feel great if i laugh out loud. Ha ha ha. I feel like there is no more problems and i enjoy the moments very much. Laugh with my brothers, sisters, mum, dad, cousins, aunts, uncles and friends. That moments is really memorable moments because sometime it will not repeat again, even so, the situation will be a little bit different. How about you? Do you feel that when you  SMILE or LAUGH , all the problems are swept away? At least for that moments right? PUT UP THE BRIGHTEST SMILE ON YOUR FACE & DON'T RES...

When i see, taste and hear something from my surroundings, it will trigger my brain and will makes me think. What is that? Why is it like that? How come it is that way? Lots of questions come up in my mind. Maybe it will be a positive way of thinking or negative way. It is all depend on me, how i control my thinking. You see, as i walk back home yesterday, my brain keep on thinking on what should i write in my blog when i reach home after this walk (he he he... catch me huh!!)..   As far as i allow my brain to keep on think from all aspects of senses that i have, i will keep on thinking. I want to control my mind, i want to keep myself in a  POSITIVE environment. In order to get that i need to  CHANGE the way of my THINKING . I need to keep on with the HAPPY mood that i have this morning till the end of TODAY . I want to have a poductive and fun at work today. But you see, i have to face one problem as i write this post now. I am SLEEPY ....

Cherish the moments that God gave me today. Be grateful of whatever i have today. Always trying to feel better today than yesterday. When yesterday seems to be a hard day, hoping that today will be a better day. Better than yesterday. Woke up early, get ready to work. Having my breakfast with some cereals and malt. Taste nice. Enjoy the moments because i will never know maybe there will be no tomorrow for me. I will never know when God want to take me away from this temporary world. To be with Him eternally. I am ready now. Ready for this day? YES . I am ready, ready to face another day of tense working day. When i am hoping and praying for a BETTER day today, i hope you also have a beautiful day TODAY . God bless. Till then! With Love, Little Rose

Went to the office with my friend. Decided to do some car pool because of limited parking space. The pack/ jam parking space makes me lazy to drive my own car. Besides car pool is better in term of fighting for Global Warming? I think so. Reduce cars running on the road. It was started yesterday i've decided to follow my friend to the office. On going back home, i follow another friend but then i only ask him to drop me at the housing entrance gate. Decided to take a walk to reach my house. Stop by at the store to buy carrot (for my friend since she had a stomachache, hope this will help) and also a bottle of 100 plus, also for her. Hope with this she can recover from dehydrating. Greets a few of my friends. Get a few questions such as, " Kau jalan kaki ka?..... Maybe they were curious why i am walking today. Just telling them that i need some exercise. After bought these two items, i walk back home. Along the way, i notice a few things. There were a lots of kids, playing ...

When i am stuck in the middle of something, i am BLANK . Nothing i can think of while i am in that situation. I need some space and quite moments to think and do some reflection. Try to figure out what is actually happen and what should i do to ensure i can go out from that situation. However, most of the time, i am running away. I am running away from solving it. Am i doing the right thing? NO . People always say that running away is not the solution. YES . Maybe they are so true about it. As for me, emotions can control me and because of the emotions i come up with the solution “RUNNING AWAY”. Even though i know it is not the right thing to do. I am judgemental? YES. Sometimes i do judge people. Why? It is not because i am PERFECT but it is because i see things not done according to the plan or something is not right. Is it COMPLAINING ? Maybe. Okay, i am not thinking straight now. My mind is lingering and i can not focus with my work, that is why i am writing crap in here. Til...

"You cannot control the world outside, but you can choose what you will bring into yourself. If you do not see anything of value in your life, begin by finding one thing of beauty every day until it becomes a habit." ~ By Ron Rathbun P.s: So, i think i need to find out value of myself too. With Love, Little Rose

" Whatever difficult situation you are going through, just smile!" People tend to fret, nag, complain a lot when they go through rough times. But doing that a lot would not solve the problem. A smile rather puts you in the right frame of mind that everything will eventually be okay! It's psychological! ~ Chika Nwachukwu --- Nigeria ~ Have a great & blessed day! God bless.. With Love, Little Rose

Something come up in my mind... Something that i think i want to share here. Before i continue with my writing, i want to say, this is just my personal view okay. Not to condemn anybody or anyone or whatsoever.  I notice that i can easily trust people. I can easily click to anyone that i can share stories or experiences with me. Is this my weakness or my strength? I am not sure but it will depends on the situation. But still, at some point i feel this is my weakness. In this tough and rough world, there are various types of people around me, i met each and every day of my life. In my working life, my personal daily life. When i feel there is a strong chemistry between me and the person that i met, i can easily become her or his friends. That is me! If the other person is having sincere intention to become my friend then, i may say that i am lucky enough. However, if that person have hidden agenda such as wanted to make use of me or pretender a.k.a hypocrite then i am into tro...

It has been a while, i did not produce any earrings right? Hmmm... it is due to my work loads and i don't have materials to produce different design or type of beads. I was having a meeting at KK on Friday so i have a chance to buy some new materials. I am still new to this crafts so, i am not good in selecting beads and other materials for producing earrings. Besides, it was so difficult to find the right shop with varieties of materials and worth buying. There was one at Wisma Merdeka but it is very expensive, another one at Sinsuran and it is expensive too. A friend told me there is another shop at Segama street, so i found two shops last Friday. The price is just okay and cheaper from the other two but not many choices. With the new beads, i produce another nine design of earrings but still very basic and simple. He he he.. I am still a beginner okay! Here it is. Okay that is all nine of my new inventions. Ha ha ha... Just an ordinary one because still i don't ha...